There are some days when I look up into the sky and wonder if anything else would like to drop down into my lap. I guess you could say this is just one of those weeks. We all have them. And how we deal wtih them is what makes us stronger. So... because I know I am at my limit I am asking a favor. Hello sky. My lap is quite full so please don't drop anything else down. Thank you kindly.
This is not a pity party. This is purely a statement that sometimes there is just too much going on and one needs to retreat to collect one's thoughts and remember that life is good and that each day is a blesing. Being a Mom is a full-time job. It is my favorite role and I cherish every moment of being a Mom. I wish I was a better Mom. I wish I had more patience. I wish that I could always remain in the moment versus two and three steps ahead, planning for the next thing and worrying about whether the last thing was good enough. I wish that there were more hours in the day so I could do a better job of balancing the demands of being a working Mom and being a fun, hip, ready for anything Mom. I want to be what my Mom was for me. I want to be better. This week I am thinking about my Mom and I am reminded of everything she has done for me and everything that she still does not just for me, but for my beautiful children. She is just an amazing Mom. And unlike me, she is not a stresser.
And perhaps this week with the rain coming down in every direction - work, home, family, and beyond... I feel a little out of balance. I think this is the first time, in a long time, that my primary worry has not been baby Cecily. And for this I smile! Little Cec is doing so great that when I run through my mental "worry list"... it is a little easier to let the corners of my mouth turn upward. She is thriving. She is growing. She is gaining weight without a worry and she is engaging with her environment in new ways, EVERY day. What a joy! What a gift! Noah is developing into a real boy. A big boy. Where is my baby? He has a personality that I adore adn admire. He is his Daddy and he has a heart that is so big and a soul that is so gentle... and a body that is too big for his 4 year old frame! I see his shoes at the front door and think... who lives here? My baby can't be that big. Noah and Cecily are my sun, moon and stars. And they are doing great. I am grateful.
But tonight, with both kids in bed, husband sleeping too, I find myself sitting up and worrying. I would really like a magic wand right now. Sky - if you are dropping things down I will take one. And I promise not to abuse it for silly things. I will not use it to clean my house or make the laundry disappear (Thank you Kim... you are a wand!) or to make the bills evaporate (but that would be lovely). I would just like to wave it around and encircle all of my loved ones in a giant, protective bubble that was impervious to anything bad. I need a bubble right now and I'd like to live in it, too. So Sky. If you are going to drop anything else on me - please make sure that everyone I love is inside my bubble before you do. We need each other.
Onwards and upwards!
This is not a pity party. This is purely a statement that sometimes there is just too much going on and one needs to retreat to collect one's thoughts and remember that life is good and that each day is a blesing. Being a Mom is a full-time job. It is my favorite role and I cherish every moment of being a Mom. I wish I was a better Mom. I wish I had more patience. I wish that I could always remain in the moment versus two and three steps ahead, planning for the next thing and worrying about whether the last thing was good enough. I wish that there were more hours in the day so I could do a better job of balancing the demands of being a working Mom and being a fun, hip, ready for anything Mom. I want to be what my Mom was for me. I want to be better. This week I am thinking about my Mom and I am reminded of everything she has done for me and everything that she still does not just for me, but for my beautiful children. She is just an amazing Mom. And unlike me, she is not a stresser.
And perhaps this week with the rain coming down in every direction - work, home, family, and beyond... I feel a little out of balance. I think this is the first time, in a long time, that my primary worry has not been baby Cecily. And for this I smile! Little Cec is doing so great that when I run through my mental "worry list"... it is a little easier to let the corners of my mouth turn upward. She is thriving. She is growing. She is gaining weight without a worry and she is engaging with her environment in new ways, EVERY day. What a joy! What a gift! Noah is developing into a real boy. A big boy. Where is my baby? He has a personality that I adore adn admire. He is his Daddy and he has a heart that is so big and a soul that is so gentle... and a body that is too big for his 4 year old frame! I see his shoes at the front door and think... who lives here? My baby can't be that big. Noah and Cecily are my sun, moon and stars. And they are doing great. I am grateful.
But tonight, with both kids in bed, husband sleeping too, I find myself sitting up and worrying. I would really like a magic wand right now. Sky - if you are dropping things down I will take one. And I promise not to abuse it for silly things. I will not use it to clean my house or make the laundry disappear (Thank you Kim... you are a wand!) or to make the bills evaporate (but that would be lovely). I would just like to wave it around and encircle all of my loved ones in a giant, protective bubble that was impervious to anything bad. I need a bubble right now and I'd like to live in it, too. So Sky. If you are going to drop anything else on me - please make sure that everyone I love is inside my bubble before you do. We need each other.
Onwards and upwards!
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