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Welcome to Holland

9/12/2010

3 Comments

 
My dear friend Paris shared this story with me when Cecily was just a few months old. It was a challenging time in our life and we were battling a host of new feelings - from excitement, to fear, to confusion to anxiety. At this time the Doctors had no reason to believe Cecily was not the typical child - but we knew otherwise.  Thanks to Paris and the support of family, friends and Dr. Wood - we're in a wonderful place in our life.  I want to thank a stranger who contacted me on Facebook to share this amazing story again - complete with author and copyright. I think this is an insightful way of helping to understand that alternate paths in life are just as amazing!

WELCOME TO HOLLAND
by Emily Perl Kingsley.
c1987 by Emily Perl Kingsley. All rights reserved

I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability - to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's like this......

When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting.

After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland."

"Holland?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland?? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy."

But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.

The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place.

So you must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.

It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around.... and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills....and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.

But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy... and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned."

And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away... because the loss of that dream is a very very significant loss.

But... if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things ... about Holland.

We're not sure where we are most days - but we we know we are happy, we are loved, we are lucky and we are blessed. We are grateful. Cecily has definitely taken us on a very special journey and we are finally enjoying the ride. Onwards and upwards!
3 Comments
Mary Gibbons
9/12/2010 02:41:45 pm

I know this story well! My sister read this story after Patrick was born. She even included it on her birth announcement! We have found it to be so true, and "Holland" is a pretty awesome place to be:)

Reply
Nancy
9/12/2010 02:59:16 pm

I love this story.

Reply
Anita
9/12/2010 03:14:44 pm

Beautiful :)

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